Self Belief Unsquashed

155: Manage negative self talk with this mind trick. Trisha Lewis.

Stop beating yourself up! Not so easy. Negative self talk, inner critic, catastrophising, self-doubt spirals - they are a natural consequence of being human.
But - our rush to beat ourselfs up when we believe we have 'failed' in some way - is a real squasher! It stops us moving forward and often results in us wallowing in a swamp of self-doubt for hours, weeks or even years!
In this episode you will join me in exploring why we do this negative self-talk and - crucially - how we can manage it - accept it and then do something to move us forward.
There is a kind of mind trick involved - and it revolves around a well researched concept - 'distanced self talk' -  Article here.
I also recommend the book - 'Chatter' by Ethan Kross.
And - my book - 'The Mystery of the Squashed Self' and TEDx talk.
 
Subscribe and share - please!

154: Flourishing as an individual in a collective. With Emily Braithwaite

How to flourish as an individual in a Collective. Have you found your tribe? Do you feel valued for your individual approach and contribution whilst also part of a supportive group with shared aims?
Emily Braithwaite is the co founder of 'Yellow Tuxedo' - online visibility for small business owners. They have a brilliant community called Digital Circus and so she understands this need for being amongst a group that see you as an individual. In this episode you also hear her squashing and unsquashing story and how she maintains her individuality whilst working with her husband!
Emily also shares an inspiring story about a recent trip to Malawi with a group of women - to work with a group of aspiring business women. A gripping listen!
The podcast with full PDF Transcript is on my website - also on all main pod platforms. https://trishalewis.com/unsquashed-blog/
Emily Braithwaite - Yellow Tuxedo Website: https://www.yellowtuxedo.co.uk/
 
NB - If you prefer to watch - the video is on my YouTube channel - here: https://youtu.be/dtYLYjcxWxQ?feature=shared
 
Enjoy the episode and subscribe. Please take time to leave a review on your favourite platform to help spread the word if you find this podcast informative, motivating, enjoyable or simply 'calming'! Find out more about my communication and confidence coaching services as well as my unsquashing mission (the book, the TEDx) at https://trishalewis.com/stay-unsquashed/

153: Navigating Feelings of Inferiority When Others Shine.

Do you get a pang of feeling inferior when you hear someone else being praised. You know it is irrational. You don't want to be an envious type. You want to feel fine about other people being great! The problem is - you are reacting from your self-squashed self! How to stop this odd form of comparisonitis? How to embrace other people's achievments without seeing it as a dig at you - that someone you are 'less than'?
 
In this short unsquasher episode you will be asked to do an audit on the FIBs that might be fuelling this reaction - the fears, illusions and baggage. 
Short and sweet - and very human real!
 
Full transcript at www.trishalewis.com - pod/blog page.
Video version on my YouTube channel.
Subscribe to this podcast for the short unsquashers and the longer explorations with fascinating guests.

152: Believe in the value of your non-fiction book idea. Helen Pollock

Why are you allowing self-doubt to squash your non-fiction book idea? Why do women in particular have deep fears about being judged negatively if they publish a non-fiction book about the thing they have tons of experience in - that will help others? What are the procrastination demons and what do you do to get unstuck and belief in your right to write that book!
 
My guest is Helen Pollock - founder of 'Her Next Chapter' - with a rich background in PR, Ghostwriting and content coaching.  She is on a mission to help women entrepreneurs create more impact, inspire others and build a legacy no-one can take away from them, by writing a business book to be proud of.
Quote: (Helen frequently hears this from her clients)
"Am I being arrogant? Am I showing off? Will people judge me for doing this - for writing this - for little old me writing a book."
 
More details on the resource Helen is offering can be found here.
 
Full episode transcript on podcast page here.
YouTube video version here.
 

151: Are you who you think you are?

This is about identity labels and growth mindset versus fixed mindset. What lies behind phrases such as 'not my thing' or 'never been like that'? Time for an audit on how much 'should' your are doing - because you have got stuck in a stale and potentially squashed identity. You will hear a short but very real example of the way we get stuck and the way we can unstick and embrace new phases of identity evolution! A short unsquasher episode. 
 
Transcript at trishalewis.com - pod/blog page.
Video version on my YouTube Channel.

150: Narcissistic Abuse - understand and heal. Guest Amanda Craven

You have heard about narcissists - but how do you know if one is in your life? How do you know that your deflating, inhibiting lack of self-belief is due to ongoing or past narcissistic abuse? My guest Amanda Craven is a clinical hypnotherapist who helps people recover from emotional trauma. She shares her personal story - as does your host! Insights and practical steps as always.
 
For episode transcript - head to www.trishalewis.com pod/blog section.
You can view this episode on my YouTube channel

149: Fear of Being Boring. Trisha Lewis.

What lies behind your fear of being boring in conversations? Is this fear of other people thinking you are boring - holding you back and sucking the joy from social or work based conversations?
Welcome to another short unsquasher.
In this episode we unpack what you might mean by 'boring' and how to do the forensics with some simple steps that will give you a reframe and a refresh.
If you really are boring (and remember it is your inner fear at play) - there is hope!
For more on 'unsquashing' check out resources at www.trishalewis.com and my YouTube channel - Self Belief Unsquashed.
 

148: Confidence Building After Health Scare: With Crescentia Cook

How do you rebuild confidence and stop your self-belief being squashed when an unexpected health scare changes your world? My guest is 'Heart Healthy Living Coach - Crescentia Cook. She specialises in supporting those with Atrial Fibrillation. Her personal experience, knowledge and coaching expertise means this episode will be hugely valuable to you if you are dealing with anxiety that is 'shrinking your world' and messing with your confidence. Plenty of practical tips and resources for you to explore.
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Links to resources mentioned:
Books and events - Dr David Hamilton.  
https://drdavidhamilton.com/More about the science and research into EFT  https://eftinternational.org/discover-eft-tapping/eft-science-research/Havening https://www.havening.org/Crescentia Cook's website: www.hearthealthylivingcoach.co.uk
 
How Emotions Are Made - Dr Lisa Feldman Barrett
 
Rough TRANSCRIPT
 
- and more on 'Unsquashing' - head over to my website here. 
https://trishalewis.com

147: Take Back Your Power. Gerri McHugh

Self belief includes working on your sense of agency - taking back your power.  You have more power to create change in yourself and in the world than you realise. My guest Gerri McHugh is the founder of Global Health Film - her life and work challenges have meant nurturing her own self belief and that of her film makers too! But how exactly...?
 
PDF Transcript here
Gerri McHugh on LinkedIn
Global Health Film Website
Referenced in this episode:
Quotes:  
J M Storm - Find on Instagram or his poetry book on Amazon
Valentina White's chapter in: 'Creating Success: Entrepreneurs & Changemakers Share Wisdom on Achieving Success on Your Own Terms' - Amazon
TV series - My Mum Your Dad with Davina McCall - ITVx
 
Want to know more about 'unsquashing' self belief?  Visit my website.

146: Self Belief - What is it?

What does Self Belief feel like? Tricky to answer isn't it? In this episode I use the '5 Whys' questioning technique to dig a little deeper on that 'self belief feeling' thing. 
This questioning leads to another 2-word phrase - 'self squashing'. What is that? Well listen to this short unsquasher episode to find out.
Talking of 'self' - self awarness is an essential ingredient in finding and nurturing your unsquashed self - and that means doing forensics on the FIBs that hold you back -  that stands for something - listen and discover.
As always - the insights and the tips are for all us humans trying to live with joy, impact and growth in a fascinatingly complex world.
Want to explore 'Unsquashing' more?
My book:  The Mystery of the Squashed Self
TEDx Talk:  Beware the Self Squashing Prophecy
And sign up for my (non salesy) Unsquashed email.